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Chuckle in Your Day! (AKA the joke thread)

Jiman01

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Jiman01

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Tazzieman

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I had the bulb taken out once to get rid of a warning light, never came on again after that, true story!!
My Porsche 928 brake pad wear light is always on, so I used Earl's duct tape trick.
 
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Tazzieman

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My son in law takes everything to the best level that he can and he has absolutely perfect soft lush green grass out front of their house Brisbane.
1:22 am last night the security camera caught some locals wrestling on it.
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Is your son triggered by poo on the grass?
I have fenced all of my hoppy bush critters out.
 

DaveB

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Is your son triggered by poo on the grass?
I have fenced all of my hoppy bush critters out.
He has spoken with the postman who now rides his bike up the driveway, puts mail in letterbox, goes back down the driveway along road and up neighbours driveway.
He then continues to ride along the grass footpath in front of every other house in the neighbourhood.
 

DaveB

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Clark Kent

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He has spoken with the postman who now rides his bike up the driveway, puts mail in letterbox, goes back down the driveway along road and up neighbours driveway.
He then continues to ride along the grass footpath in front of every other house in the neighbourhood.
I once lived next to a concreter who was a pretty rough bloke generally but had two obsessions. One was his lawn and the other was his indoor tropical aquarium.
He used a hand pushed rotary drum mower on his lawn. Not common but not weird either. He then got down on his knees and used a pair of 6 inch (150mm) craft scissors to do the edges. This was a 1/2 acre (2000 sq.m) house block with extensive paving and edging. That's some hard core lawn love.

The aquarium obsession stopped when his wife decided to clean the tank when he was working away for a couple of weeks. She'd watched him do it many times, easy peasy. Suffice to say using bleach to remove mould was never part of his cleaning process. He got home to some expensive floating fish and a shocked wife.
 

Tazzieman

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I once lived next to a concreter who was a pretty rough bloke generally but had two obsessions. One was his lawn and the other was his indoor tropical aquarium.
He used a hand pushed rotary drum mower on his lawn. Not common but not weird either. He then got down on his knees and used a pair of 6 inch (150mm) craft scissors to do the edges. This was a 1/2 acre (2000 sq.m) house block with extensive paving and edging. That's some hard core lawn love.

The aquarium obsession stopped when his wife decided to clean the tank when he was working away for a couple of weeks. She'd watched him do it many times, easy peasy. Suffice to say using bleach to remove mould was never part of his cleaning process. He got home to some expensive floating fish and a shocked wife.
 

Eric

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I didn't know that 😂😂
That's why Mercedes built the factory in the first place, to build the Smart cars. Part of the deal when Ineos bought the factory from Mercedes, they would continue its production. Don't know what happens now cos all Smart cars are EVs and I thought production was switching to China, after Geely took major share.
 
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