Chuckle in Your Day! (AKA the joke thread)

[DaveB]

This just has to make you laugh......because you couldn't take it seriously.

View: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1YcGCnfrrWY

 

[Jiman01]

This just has to make you laugh......because you couldn't take it seriously.

View: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1YcGCnfrrWY

“These are controls for off-road settings, blah, blah blah”…..I.e. controls you will never use

 

[rovie]

I was out and about and looked out for Bison Gear and took a photo. But how am I supposed to attach them to the Grenadier? Joking aside. It's nice to be able to see such impressive animals here in Germany, even if it makes me feel like I'm in North America.

 

[Tazzieman]

And the bicycle was undamaged in the collision. Hit and run, well hit and pedal.

 

[bigleonski]

And the bicycle was undamaged in the collision. Hit and run, well hit and pedal.
View attachment 7862849

Seems a drastic way to improve its looks to me.

 

[Tazzieman]

 

[DaveB]

 

[Tazzieman]

View attachment 7862942

Gotta love an extra long 5 legged sheep talking to a 3 legged one!

 

[Tazzieman]

Best sheep film ever

View: https://youtu.be/E2GHSALcfmM?si=mFeWmjHTc-4q9sx8

 

[DaveB]

Gotta love an extra long 5 legged sheep talking to a 3 legged one!

Genetically altered for Sunday roasts.
The 3 legged one has already survived two Sundays

 

[Tazzieman]

Genetically altered for Sunday roasts.
The 3 legged one has already survived two Sundays
View attachment 7862944

More believable than a River Seine that will ever be clean.
Those frogs entertain some strange practises, and we're not talking about force-fed fatty-livered geese in the following link.

Why This Famous French Dish Is Eaten With A Towel Over Your Head - Mashed

Read on for the true tale and details behind the highly-coveted French delicacy that people wear towels over their head to eat.

www.mashed.com

 

[DaveB]

More believable than a River Seine that will ever be clean.
Those frogs entertain some strange practises, and we're not talking about force-fed fatty-livered geese in the following link.

Why This Famous French Dish Is Eaten With A Towel Over Your Head - Mashed

Read on for the true tale and details behind the highly-coveted French delicacy that people wear towels over their head to eat.

www.mashed.com

I took 17 customers there for two weeks back in 1994.
We had chickens comb. chickens beak, chickens feet and chickens stomach
I asked them what the hell they did with the actual chicken.
Not as bad as a business trip to Switzerland in 1999
First night melted cheese with stale bread.
I didn't eat much as I was waiting for the main course.
That was the main course.
I laughed anyway.
Next night with a different host it wasn't so funny.
3rd night I was really pissed off.
Fourth night I said I was tired and would pass on dinner.
The host said... Don't worry, I am Austrian, we will eat lots and lots of meat.

 

[Tazzieman]

The host said... Don't worry, I am Austrian, we will eat lots and lots of meat.

Uh, today we have, uh, for appetizers: Excuse me. Mhmm. Uh, moules marinières, pâté de foie gras, beluga caviar, eggs Benedictine, tart de poireaux-- that's leek tart,-- frogs' legs amandine, or oeufs de caille Richard Shepherd-- c'est à dire, little quails' eggs on a bed of puréed mushroom. It's very delicate. Very subtle.

MR. CREOSOTE: I'll have the lot.

MAÎTRE D: A wise choice, monsieur. And now, how would you like it served? All, uh, mixed up togezer in a bucket?

MR. CREOSOTE: Yeah,... with the eggs on top.

MAÎTRE D: But of course, avec les oeufs frites.

MR. CREOSOTE: Yeah, and don't skimp on the pâté.

MAÎTRE D: Oh, monsieur, I assure you, just because it is mixed up wis all ze other things, we would not dream of giving you less than ze full amount. In fact, I will personally make sure you have a double helping. Maintenant quelque chose à boire. Something to drink, monsieur?

MR. CREOSOTE: Yeah, I'll have six bottles of Château Latour Forty-five...

MAÎTRE D: Forty-five.

MR. CREOSOTE: ...and a double Jeroboam of champagne.

MAÎTRE D: Bon, and the usual brown ales?

MR. CREOSOTE: Yeah. No, wait a minute. I think I can only manage six crates today.

MAÎTRE D: [tut tut tut tut] I hope monsieur was not overdoing it last night.

MR. CREOSOTE: Shut up!

 

[DaveB]

Uh, today we have, uh, for appetizers: Excuse me. Mhmm. Uh, moules marinières, pâté de foie gras, beluga caviar, eggs Benedictine, tart de poireaux-- that's leek tart,-- frogs' legs amandine, or oeufs de caille Richard Shepherd-- c'est à dire, little quails' eggs on a bed of puréed mushroom. It's very delicate. Very subtle.

MR. CREOSOTE: I'll have the lot.

MAÎTRE D: A wise choice, monsieur. And now, how would you like it served? All, uh, mixed up togezer in a bucket?

MR. CREOSOTE: Yeah,... with the eggs on top.

MAÎTRE D: But of course, avec les oeufs frites.

MR. CREOSOTE: Yeah, and don't skimp on the pâté.

MAÎTRE D: Oh, monsieur, I assure you, just because it is mixed up wis all ze other things, we would not dream of giving you less than ze full amount. In fact, I will personally make sure you have a double helping. Maintenant quelque chose à boire. Something to drink, monsieur?

MR. CREOSOTE: Yeah, I'll have six bottles of Château Latour Forty-five...

MAÎTRE D: Forty-five.

MR. CREOSOTE: ...and a double Jeroboam of champagne.

MAÎTRE D: Bon, and the usual brown ales?

MR. CREOSOTE: Yeah. No, wait a minute. I think I can only manage six crates today.

MAÎTRE D: [tut tut tut tut] I hope monsieur was not overdoing it last night.

MR. CREOSOTE: Shut up!

View attachment 7862946

And a wafer thin after dinner mint

 

[Tazzieman]

And a wafer thin after dinner mint

FOFF!

 

[Tazzieman]

 

[Jiman01]

 

[DaveB]

More believable than a River Seine that will ever be clean.
Those frogs entertain some strange practises, and we're not talking about force-fed fatty-livered geese in the following link.

Why This Famous French Dish Is Eaten With A Towel Over Your Head - Mashed

Read on for the true tale and details behind the highly-coveted French delicacy that people wear towels over their head to eat.

www.mashed.com

I recall about 20 years ago I was sitting at an outdoor cafe in Paris having a coffee and the street sweepers were sweeping all the rubbish into the gutter.
Then they turned on the fire hydrants and washed it all down into the Seine.

 

[Tazzieman]

I recall about 20 years ago I was sitting at an outdoor cafe in Paris having a coffee and the street sweepers were sweeping all the rubbish into the gutter.
Then they turned on the fire hydrants and washed it all down into the Seine.
View attachment 7863160

I was at a conference in Nice in '98; my main memory on the 15 minute root (that's how it's pronounced in Australia ) home was dog merdes every 20m or so on the pavement and bicycle tracks stretching them out .
And in the early morning the council workers and their pressure hoses attempting to cover up the problem before the tourists start to Wanda..
The problem largely due to this demographic

 

[DaveB]

I was at a conference in Nice in '98; my main memory on the 15 minute root (that's how it's pronounced in Australia ) home was dog merdes every 20m or so on the pavement and bicycle tracks stretching them out .
And in the early morning the council workers and their pressure hoses attempting to cover up the problem before the tourists start to Wanda..
The problem largely due to this demographic
View attachment 7863162

In Paris they have these motorbikes with vacuum cleaners on them